Martin Anthony de Souza - 23 October 1928 to 28 August 2018
|The following was in the Canberra times of Saturday 8 September 2018|
A Mass of Thanksgiving for the life of
Anthony had a massive
stroke during the early hours of Thursday 23 August, and was taken to
At 10:40am on
he passed away peacefully with his wife, son and
granddaughter by his side. Most of his family, including his wife, son,
grandchildren and nephew and many friends were with him continuously during his last few
He is survived by:
Photos and information about Anthony are in this facebook album <click>. This video was taken after the funeral of Neil's Grandmother's <click> and highlights the fun character of Anthony in his later years. He comes in at about the two minute mark.
Everyday people get a chance to be an angel in someone's life! Thank you to all of you who have been an angel in Mum's, Dad's and my life.
This eulogy is from Alyse de Souza (Grand daughter):
Its very special for me to do part of the eulogy because grandpa and I were very similar, we are both loud, similar humour and personalities, and are both "simple and humble". I am lucky to have known him for 21 years.
I have had many good memories with grandpa, he is an unforgettable man with his unique qualities. I remember being at parties and one of us kids would have the responsibility of looking after grandpa. This meant following him when he goes walk about with this we got to meet so many people. He was very sociable and keen to hear people’s views on world issues and where they come from. Grandpa taught me the simplicity of connecting with people, its as easy as saying hi. He was so funny too. I remember one of the funniest moments I had with him was maybe 10 years ago grandma and grandpa and my family were walking around Henley beach and a lady with a dog went past and grandpa started singing how much is that doggy in the window. Hahaha the lady is just laughing and she is like my dog is not for sale. But it is so refreshing seeing people like grandpa making others smile and laugh and being so approachable to have a chat.
Grandpa was very fond of us grandkids and Jasmine his great grandchild. He would greet us with a coochie coochie coo how do you do? Or how you going "bebe"? He had a unique way of pronouncing his words with his accent "i carumba" he used to say alot it. Whenever we came over he used to make really nice fried chicken. It was finger lickin good. Those are some qualities that I will remember of him.
Grandpa taught us grandkids that there is more to life than worrying. Instead we should travel, adapt to change and keep learning. His funny easy going vibe will be missed dearly. We love him and will treasure the memories.
This eulogy is from his nephew Mark Anthony Desa:
Tribute to Martinho Anthony de Souza - from his nephew Mark Anthony Desa
I am here to reflect on a Man for all Seasons....., a good family man, a doting husband, loving father, grandfather, great grand-father, brother, uncle and as evidenced by this congregation today, a great friend to many.
My uncle was born in Nairobi, Kenya and spent his early childhood in Jinja, Uganda. His antecedents originated in Goa, the Portuguese colony of India. He spent formative years studying in Bangalore & Madras, India then moved back to Mombasa, Kenya. He worked with the Kenyan Police Department, later becoming a Lecturer.
When political adversity crept in, Anthony regretfully abandoned Africa’s beguiling beauty, moving his parents, wife and son, to England, thereafter culminating in a final journey to Australia. The intrinsic courage required to physically uproot oneself & family, to seek a future beyond distant horizons cannot be understated. Arriving in Bordertown, then Port Pirie, Australia in his 50s, to yet again start a new life speaks to his sheer strength of character & mental fortitude!
There was diversity over the decades - a changing world order, human evolution, massive technological advancement - but he bravely attuned himself to it all. The great adaptor in him embraced transformation, refining his mind to imbibe knowledge and skills that kept him computer literate to the very end, a trait so truly laudable, given his advanced years.
He kept his mind and body busy, staying active, maintaining mental dexterity to stave off senility and other debilitating ailments of the mind.
He walked straight and tall, never stooping with the onset of age. He never genuflected to insolence, bias and bigotry. He spoke well, without temerity, bolstered by his erudition.
He was an avid philatelist (stamps) and numismatist (coins). He could wax eloquent & hold discourse & debate on any topic, displaying high levels of cognition. When in good spirits, some tales saw liberal embellishment
A Lecturer by profession, he was proficient in Philosophy, Literature, Finance and Economics. He often emailed my children and I with snippets on these subjects, to help with our studies.
He regularly visited us in Sydney, disappearing after his meals, to smoke a cigarette or two in the backgarden. When Nolette called out ‘Where are you Anthony? he would emerge from the bushes, the last plume of smoke emanating from his nostrils, exhorting: “just searching for thieves, Sweetie”. Other times, he went 'walk about' where we had to send out a search party, only to locate him a couple of streets away chatting with strangers.
There were instances he seemed terse, especially to new arrivals in Australia, chiding them on poor diction, dress-code, the strange nuances or alien cadences of their voices. I saw a greater desire dormant within him, urging these people to self-improvement. He saw himself in these beings so here he was, endeavouring to galvanise them to dress better, speak better, learn better, live better! In essence, catalysing them to greater aspiration. These instances exhibit a more profound caring & compassion shared for all around him.
Yesterday was the start of the Summer Soccer season in Sydney. Whilst on the field, several times, my eyes drifted to the sidelines, picturing Uncle Anthony's presence, with his leather bomber jacket and cool Aviator sunglasses on. On many occasions, he volunteered to attend the soccer games of my wife and children. "Go get them, bebe" were his last words of advice to the girls, as they ran onto the playing field.
Uncle Anthony, we contemplate all the good you shared and knowledge imparted to family, friends, strangers, students, postulants and new immigrants, over the many years. You leave behind such a rich legacy, which will be remembered fondly by many.
These spoken words can never do justice as they are an inadequate distillation of an enriched, adventurous existence - one that was lived well, lived contented, lived with love and lived with empathy.
Your presence will be sorely missed. But we subordinate the immense grief of your departure to the celebration of a glorious, fulfilling life lived. You were a truly altruistic, good-natured, decent human-being, devoid of malice and insincerity. You passed this way but once, believing that any good that could be done, should be done. And so, you did.
Travel well to the next world, enshrouded in love from all of us that knew you, including numerous others that were fortunate to cross paths with you. Requiescat in Pace. May your kind soul Rest in Peace.
This eulogy is from Louisa de Souza de SA (One of Anthony's
(One of Anthony's Sisters):
A perennial optimist Anthony Martin Druston de Souza was born authentic, felicitous, generous, caring, peaceful, unflappable, erudite, curious, with talents many and diverse. Possessing a certain “ je ne sais quo”, Anthony was an avid reader and writer par excellence who could discuss at length any topic. Comedic and always seeing the funny side of life, he sponsored the jovial angle of existence and would push pray over frustration and angst.
During the war, with our dad Louis Manuel away at his bank job in Kenya and Uganda, Anthony became our mother’s trusted confidante, supporting her with well-thought-out solutions to problems, and moving us from Kenya to South India for our education and rearing. As the war escalated and money transactions from abroad stopped, mom was forced to sell her jewelry for our livelihood and I joined the Armed Forces in an office capacity to alleviate food and bill issues.
Adversity allows personal growth and opportunity. Anthony as the oldest son, revealed his compassionate heart when worried about global turmoil, and traumatized by Germany’s initial success cried often but was instrumental in helping the family through managing the household. Maxi joined the Good Shepherd Order and attended Teachers’ Training College where she ultimately became principal of St Anthony’s school before transferring to England and the States. Our younger siblings attended school. Raised in an education-minded family, we were imbued with a love for knowledge and all of us esp Anthony wrote poetry, and funny, satirical stories with a humorous angle. All of us drew and painted.
When I was pregnant with my third child Paula, I returned from Bombay where I resided, to Kenya. Accompanying Anthony and his friend on their school holidays to Tanganika, and a safari by car, I waited too long to inform the men of my progressing pregnancy issues. Though far away and driving through the Serengeti, Paula was born in a car but Anthony quickly maneuvered as best he could to the local hospital. Two days later on being discharged 2 day old Paula and I continued with Anthony on a safari-just before his wedding to Nolette. Through Anthony I met Mr. Kenyatta and his family and Mr. Nyerere, the prime minister of Tanganyika.
Anthony‘s influence ran
far and wide; he started a tourist magazine called “ The Twiga”,
another word for giraffe. In collusion with the Kenya tourism board, he
helped improve Kenya’s economy by putting Kenya on the global map thus
enhancing the flow of tourism making Kenya highly popular. When Kenya
received her independence from Britain, Anthony and Nolette moved their
son Neil to England for a higher education along with our aging
parents. Years later they all moved to Australia where Neil met
Annalynn and married.
Anthony was very instrumental and influential in many ways... for which we will be forever grateful.
Anthony you were truly blessed, highly favored and exceedingly loved. May your soul in its brightness connect you intimately with the rhythm of the universe as you make your way towards God and our beloved ancestors.
Louisa de Souza de SA
Eulogies/emails from Others:
I am struggling with putting words together to express the numbness we feel at the loss of Cousin Tony. We were all so very close in London and Allen and I will never forget the hospitality and love you showed us during our early years of marriage, when we stayed with you in Addiscombe. I felt that Tony had a special place for me in his life back then. Whatever happened, moving countries meant that we lost touch.
Anthony, or Martinho, as he liked to refer to himself as, was our oldest cousin, the most intelligent and educated of us all. He stood out from the crowd, with you at his side, and you were both the centre of our lives. Anthony made it to 90 years old and you both shared more than 50 years together. We are so happy that you had this time together. Sweetie, this is a hard time for you, Neil and your family. There will be a first for every occasion, months will turn into years, but the memories that you and Tony shared together will last a lifetime. I know that Allen and I will keep his memory in our lives. Playing bridge with you guys, particularly partnering him in any game was hilarious and an experience in finessing and aplomb. I will always remember the parties at your house, the singing. ...your beautiful voice and the pride that appeared on Tony's face whenever you sang. I remember the afternoons when Agnelo, Agnes, Ernie, Tony Pereira, Melvyn, Neva, Allen and I, amongst many other's, would hang out at Addiscombe Road on a Sunday to play cards, gather around you at the piano to sing and eat your delicious cooking. Neil would have been around 9 years old and he was one of the sweetest boys that I have ever known. Wow... just writing here has led to such wonderful memories of happy times. But reminiscing is necessary in keeping our loved ones alive within us.
Sweetie, our heartfelt condolences to you, Neil, Annalynn, the children and all the family. Our thoughts and prayers are with you at this difficult time. May Tony rest in peace and may the Good Lord give you the strength and comfort necessary as you move forward.
Kind regards and love,
Allen, Lovey and Jordan
Dearest Neil, Annalynn and family,
It is so hard to find the adequate words to express the deep sadness that Allen and I felt to learn of dad's recent stroke and passing earlier this week.
He was such a huge influence in my life when I was younger and I looked up to him with a kind of awe and respect. Tony, or Martinho as he liked to address himself was larger than life itself. As our oldest cousin, Tony was the one that my mother used as a measure against our failing grades, our lack of social graces and elegance. We always came up short but we admired his intelligence, his sense of humour and charm. We will never forget the hospitality and support that your parents gave to Allen and me during the early years of our marriage. They opened up their home and their hearts to us and we will be eternally grateful to them for that.
Neil, as you know, you were the apple of your dad's eye and he was so very proud of you....I doubt that ever changed. That he lived a good and long life is without question. Keep his name always be on your lips and that you will carry his love in your heart. Our sincerest condolences go out to you, Annalynn and your family. May Dad rest in peace.
Love and hugs
Allen, Lovey and Jordan
Dear Sweetie, Neil, Annalynn and family:
It is with saddened hearts from Tim, Aaron, Austin and myself; ...that i
write and send condolences on the passing of Anthony. ...your loss of a
husband, father, father-in-law and grand-dad all in one, no words can
My memories of Tony are well over 45 years, when he sat at our dining table often, at my mum's home in Welling, to challenge us at Carrom. This charming man would have a cigarette hanging off to the side, and with a squint of an eye strike.... and low and behold pieces flew into pockets unimaginable.... two pieces flew in instantaneously. To date i recall this amazing player. Another piece of advice that stuck in my head. When you eat a meal and feel full - put away the plate, ...never force yourself. Well Tony i will take that advice now.....